Fless Press

2010-04-05T23:25:00.002+02:00

Dear, it's been a year, and I

Have a lovely new bear.

2010-04-01T21:03:00.004+02:00

1. Let's pretend that I'm the King and you're the Queen. Because we are both wearing hats.

2. Yes, I'll be the Queen.

1. And you can be Jesus.

3. Well...maybe not Jesus...

1. Because the Queen will drop her hat.

2. (Drops her hat)

1. And now Jesus has to pick it up.

3. Well...can't I just be the Queen's friend?

2. Yes, she can be my friend.

1. But we need Jesus to pick up her hat.

Silence.

3. I think I shall be the Queen's friend.

2. Yes!

3. Oh Queen, you dropped your hat! (Picks up hat).

2010-03-26T12:41:00.001+01:00

2010-03-21T20:02:00.002+01:00

Non-Linear Bea: Mummy Bloghead, why is photocopying so soothing - why is stapling so satisfying?

Mummy Bloghead: Because they are one of the few sensual activities permitted in a library.

2010-03-11T22:37:00.003+01:00

"I never realised why I seem to deliberately forget or ignore the sources of all the quotes and fragments I gather...I suppose it's bad research practice, but...I really love not knowing the context of a quote. It's like a mysterious jewel that you can polish and hug and keep to yourself, delighting in its beautiful inscrutability."

2010-03-06T19:48:00.001+01:00

Mummy Bloghead essays a blog (or blogs an essay)

2010-03-06T19:43:00.004+01:00

1. Another crap blog.

2. Another dead blog.

3. It is not interesting to blog about your artwork!

4. Blogging 'about' is problematic.

5. A certain portent of a blog's death is its overexposure by the author before it has any real post back log or readership.

6. Especially if the first few posts are incredibly detailed, enthusiastic, and more regular than is practical.

7. A blog is not just for Christmas.

8. No one will read your blog. Deal with it. It's like publishing a zine.

9. Don't ask your friends if they read your blog. The answer will be painful. Although it is a good test of friendship. A friend who reads your blog is a good friend.

10. Use your blogs lack of audience to your own advantage: use your blog as an experimental creative space with no restrictions or consistency.

11. Consistency will come in time when you find your blog's voice. It takes a long time.

12. You have to nurture your blog like a baby. Feed it regularly.

13. Don't feed it familiar, bland foods though. Although a bit of humility is useful in establishing consistency (as well as respecting what little audience you might have), it is important to experiment with the blog's valueless space.

14. It is almost certain you don't have an audience, but if you do, respect them and give them high quality work that is as consistent as you can manage. Respect your audience and they will respect you. Also, white text on black background is unattractive and sore on the eyes, but go for it if its important to you.

15. Remember: there are very few restrictions in blogging. Be creative. Be uncreative. Experiment with authorship as form. See where tagging takes you. What about radical categories? Do you have to publish your blog on your facebook page? And radical chronology? Radical formatting? Radical html! Screengrabs! Scans! Links! Video! Broken links!...

Exploring

2010-03-02T00:10:00.002+01:00

Maybe not so much

2010-02-24T20:23:00.002+01:00

A direct expression

2010-02-23T10:27:00.001+01:00

2010-02-17T23:08:00.002+01:00

1. Do you have a posh room in your house?

2. I...I don't know. I don't think so...

(Pause)

What is a posh room?

1. It's a room how you know you're posh.

2. Oh. (Long pause). Is it like a room that isn't useful, like a room that isn't a bedroom...or a sitting-room?

1. Yes.

2. Oh. In that case I certainly don't have a posh room.

(Pause)

Do you have a posh room?

1. Yes. It's where we keep the Wii and all the DVDs.

2010-02-15T22:20:00.002+01:00

2010-02-14T11:22:00.002+01:00

A Trying Matter

2010-02-08T15:45:00.001+01:00

Research as

2010-02-08T15:31:00.002+01:00

Process - Object

2010-02-02T12:02:00.001+01:00

Mummy Bloghead in "Yuck 'n Yum"

2010-02-01T12:25:00.005+01:00

Mummy Bloghead made an appearance in an online chat published in December's issue of Yuck 'n Yum, a Scottish art zine based in Dundee.

A frame that illuminates

2010-01-30T21:57:00.004+01:00

Islands

2010-01-28T19:37:00.004+01:00

1. What's above Scotland?

2. (Thinks)...islands. (Pause). Orkney and Shetland and that. I guess.

1. Okay. (Writes)

2 looks over to see that 1 has written "Sherkney" at the top of the page, above Scotland.

Notes on a video screening

2010-01-28T19:27:00.005+01:00

1. We are (not) in a field/gallery of art/cows

2. A (reverse) green screen (screening green).

3. Bovine saturation.

4. We could stand here till the cows come home.

2010-01-25T20:10:00.000+01:00

Fless Press Multiples at "I'm on a Boat"

2010-01-24T18:53:00.009+01:00

Now Now Projects recently asked Fless Press to publish a multiple, to be sold in p(art)y bags for I'm on a Boat, their fundraising party on the Renfrew Ferry.

Fless Press invited the artists Stuart Gibbons and Non-Linear Bea to collaborate on this project. This was their first collaboration, and we were so excited by the results! The multiples were entitled Notes Towards (I) and Notes Towards (II), and were published in a limited edition of 100 by Fless Press (see images below).

2010-01-22T18:12:00.001+01:00

Kitsch tableau

Kitchen table

2010-01-22T16:34:00.001+01:00

Rosses are red

Villits are blue

Daffils are yellow

and I love you

Notes Towards (II)

2010-01-19T00:25:00.004+01:00

1. Travel the world.

2. Find the local pound-shop equivalent, eg. "Everything's 100 Yen!"

3. Translate it so that the exchange rate is accurate with the British pound shop, eg. "Everything's 140.18 Yen!"

4. Take a photo if you like.

5. Extra points if you colonise the whole world thus.

Notes Towards (I)

2010-01-19T00:21:00.006+01:00

1. Travel the world.

2. Especially visit very picturesque towns and villages.

3. Find the town's sign name eg. "Lovelyville, Brisbane". Make sure it is in a beautiful spot, eg. in front of a gorgeous mountain.

4. Substitute the town's name with the British town of your choice, eg. "Dagenham, Brisbane".

5. Take a photo if you like.

6. Extra points if you colonise the whole world thus.

Sestina

2010-01-19T00:18:00.001+01:00

For ellipsis, read "filler"

...talents
...logic-based
...crude
...poetics
...for
...illogical

...illogical
...talents
...for
...logic-based
...poetics
...crude

...crude
...illogical
...poetics
...talents
...logic-based
...for

...for
...crude
...logic-based
...illogical
...talents
...poetics

...poetics
...for
...talents
...crude
...illogical
...logic-based

...logic-based
...poetics
...illogical
...for
...crude
...talents

Envoi:
If you lack the talents for logic-based prosody, turn your crude poetics towards a task less illogical.

2010-01-18T23:27:00.002+01:00

1. So what do you think of the Altermodern then?

2. I kind of feel like he's just banging on about travelling.

Fless Durbeyfield in Mail Art One Zine

2010-01-18T23:24:00.006+01:00

We will forgive them their error in the spelling of Fless Durbeyfield's name.

Here, the original work:

2010-01-14T11:29:00.000+01:00

2010-01-14T11:19:00.001+01:00

Fless Durbeyfield in Mail Art exhibition

2010-01-11T14:37:00.005+01:00

One of our featured artists, Fless Durbeyfield, is exhibiting work in an exhibition of Mail Art opening tonight in the Long Gallery at the Tron Theatre in Glasgow.

January Sales

2010-01-06T23:56:00.001+01:00

2009-12-27T01:01:00.001+01:00

Where calligraphy meets conifery

A snowy hillside

2009-12-22T22:35:00.004+01:00

Non-Linear Bea: (holds a letter in her hand, reads, re-reads, and sighs, letting it drop) "We where overwhelmed." (Sighs again). I wish they would spellcheck before intruding on my rejection space.

Mummy Bloghead: (calls out from offstage) Don't let them overwhelm your rejection wherea, Bea!

Non-Linear Bea: (looks touched). Overwear my rejection realm? Don't worry, I won't. (Pause). Thanks, Mummy.

Mummy Bloghead: No worries. (Long pause. Mummy Bloghead has a flash of inspiration). I know! Let's auto-correct their auto-reject!

Non-Linear Bea: (delighted) Yes! Let's auto-correct their auto-reject!

They auto-correct.

One word poem III

2009-12-17T15:33:00.002+01:00

Scabrous skin diseases

Ecztremeties

2009-12-16T15:02:00.003+01:00

Ruthless rigour of the intellectual sort

Creates more disadvantage than it really ought.

2009-12-10T23:08:00.002+01:00

Fless Durbeyfield and Renee Tryhard

2009-12-09T10:44:00.003+01:00

"Fleresa and Renee shuffle languidly through the rustling leaves of unfinished drawings, the sad un-fold of their hemlines quietly scattering forgotten stationeries."

2009-12-07T13:10:00.004+01:00

Non-Linear Bea: So why do you think it's so popular, then?

Mummy Bloghead: (Spits) Chuh! Why is bad taste ubiquitous?

Non-Linear Bea: I guess.

(Silence)

Non-Linear Bea: Mummy Bloghead, I think your area typifies the perfect figure-ground relationship.

Mummy Bloghead: Thanks, Bea.

N-L B

2009-12-02T00:19:00.001+01:00

is the title of our next published work, due for release in March 2010.

2009-12-01T23:35:00.000+01:00

"aethesthetics"

2009-11-28T19:42:00.005+01:00

Mummy Bloghead: I declare this area to be my safe space.

Non-Linear Bea: I declare...

Mummy Bloghead: This area...

Non-Linear Bea: To be...

Mummy Bloghead: My safe space.

Both: Shit!

(silence)

Non-Linear Bea: Mummy, why did you delete my birthspace?

Mummy Bloghead: DO NOT self-centre in my area. (Pause). Shit!

Fless of the PDF

2009-11-21T21:44:00.008+01:00

We at Fless Press know how hard it is to be able to afford exciting, innovative, and beautifully printed experimental publications - even when they are at the bargainous price of £2.50. As a non-profit co-operative, we too find it hard to afford such luxuries.

With this in mind we have kindly made for your perusal an online version of our recent publication, Fless of the D'Urbervilles, on the valueless space that is flesspress.blogspot.com.

Click on the title page below to download a PDF of Fless of the D'Urbervilles.

We hope you enjoy it!

2009-11-21T19:04:00.002+01:00

2009-11-17T11:28:00.001+01:00

2009-11-08T20:57:00.003+01:00

Spon-tan-e-ous-ly spon-dee,

Spon-dee spon-tan-e-ous-ly.

2009-11-08T20:55:00.002+01:00

Iamb (what) Iamb (what) Iamb.

2009-11-07T10:59:00.006+01:00

ALL: Think, Lucky, think!

LUCKY thinks in a progressively regressive inconsistently modular rhythmically unpunctuated thoughtstream for the next two pages

2009-11-03T13:50:00.002+01:00

2009-11-01T19:52:00.004+01:00

Squirming

Like an aesthete

2009-10-29T00:58:00.003+01:00

1. I'm having a little holiday. From sounds.

2. Sounds?

1. Yes. Like puh and huh is ffuh.

2. Oh...

1. And ssuh and ssuh is sss. And tuh and huh is...(screws up face, pressing tongue against roof of mouth, evidently concentrating)

(Long pause whilst we wait for sound to issue)

(No sound is made)

2. Thuh?

1. (Thinks) Yes.

Stop Fless!

2009-10-25T11:10:00.003+01:00

What the press has to say about Fless of the D'Urbervilles:

"a work of bizarre romantic genius, both tender and cold." - Fless Xpress

"A governess in a Victorian novel attempts a crossword but is distracted by thoughts of love..."- Deborah Rag, Ironing Hour

"There are moments of accidental lyricism in this processed-based output, and moments of accidental modularity in its most romantic meditations..." - Stuart Gibbons, Filthy/Minimal

"An onanistic logic puzzle" - Renee Tryhard, in her paper Fless or Fleresa: Mimetic Myth-Creation

"Kerning, or the practice of spacing letterforms typographically, is a conceptual motif in this digression on romance and design...Fless of the D'Urbervilles yearns as she kerns." - Letty Maclean, Glenda Glyph: A Typographical Magazine for Girls

"An edgy and erotic relationship between overdesign and underdesign" - Sven Svensson, Swedesign

"The pages of an experimental poetry chapbook from the 70s are torn up and pasted into the rather unremarkable diary of a teenage girl..." - Villetta Hoarfrost, Uncreative Writing Please

"Written works both obscure and explanatory (in their instructional, list-like form) are accompanied by graphic images similarly abstract and intelligible...the works echo in notepaper-gridded abstract space: semi-censored, semi-coherent." - Simon Grimm, Digressions on Inconsistency

"A 70s lifestyle magazine, which, in its aspirational advertising, fills us with longings for manuals on code-breaking, Victorian novellas, modular storage units and fine calligraphy sets..."- Catherine Which, Gloss and Spit: A Consumer Desirables Magazine

2009-10-24T12:30:00.000+02:00

2009-10-21T23:05:00.007+02:00

A man eats a chickpea cutlet sandwich, drinks a milky coffee and thinks lascivious thoughts about the female barista who just served him

Felatte

2009-10-21T22:51:00.003+02:00

Cardboardhydrate

Ryvita

Coming Soon

2009-10-17T22:18:00.001+02:00

A word for every

2009-10-16T23:25:00.001+02:00

Cloud

House

Igloo

Night

Outing

F.O.T.P

2009-10-12T21:02:00.002+02:00

fless of the press

2009-10-11T23:25:00.004+02:00

"I could not tell whether the boy behind me smelt more of crisps or of himself."

Glasgow Bus

2009-10-10T19:54:00.002+02:00

Shall we investigate every corner

of this gridded city?

Yes, let's!

But oh, if only a satellite

could trace in beautiful, beautiful time-

lapse, our relent-

less, perpen-

dicular

assault!

2009-10-06T19:19:00.002+02:00

1. Look, look.

2. (Looks) It's super...it's...

1. It's a puppet.

2. Ah. It's beautiful, I love her long hair...is it a her...a lady? Or a man...?

1. It's a Puppenzel.

2009-10-04T16:18:00.000+02:00

2009-09-30T10:54:00.003+02:00

The language of summer in Scotland is sneezes -

Of winter; scabrous skin diseases.

2009-09-29T11:52:00.000+02:00

2009-09-27T21:12:00.004+02:00

It's just unfortunate

2009-09-25T17:46:00.006+02:00

1. You faux pas'd.

2. I did not!

1. You did.

2. (silence)

1. You did...

2. Ok...I did.

1. (Waits for apology)

2. But you faux pas'd more, because you just verbed the phrase faux pas. Which is in itself...

1. A faux pas.

(Notices, but refrains from pointing out that 2 just...similarly faux pas'd).

2. Yes.

1. (Sighs)

2. I'm sorry...It was just some absent part of me...

1. It's just unfortunate, isn't it? That both our names begin with...

2. ...Yes, yes it is.

2009-09-23T00:28:00.006+02:00

Her fringe is a broom that sweeps dust from her eyes

While she searches under the bed for miscellanies.

This is the news today.

2009-09-21T21:18:00.005+02:00

1. This is the news today.

There was a little outbreak...of fleas. In Wales. (Pause)

So if you go to Wales you will get the Swine Flu.

(Long pause)

And now it's time for the weather, with Rainbow Charlotte.

2. Hello. I'm Rainbow Charlotte.

Here is the weather.

Today there will be a little bit of snow...and tomorrow there will be a little bit of sunshine.

Sunday will be...rainbowy.

On Monday...On Monday...(Looks preoccupied)

(Sings)

Monday morning

Off-to-school-I-go

Tuesday morning

Then-I-say-hello.

Monday morning

Off-to-school-I-go

Tues...Friday morning

Then I say...(long pause)

...good-bye.

1. And that was the weather with Rainbow Charlotte.

Now it's time for the Music Show.

(Pause, picks up tennis racket/guitar)

Hello. This is the Music Show.

This is a song by the Clumsy Ubbles, and it was written in 1654. Which was a very long time ago.

One, two, three, four (plays a rock song, with an elaborate solo)

(Suddenly screen turns to black)

(Stops) Oh no! (We hear the sound of the guitar/tennis racket being dropped)

There has been a power cut.

And so I can't play because I have an electric guitar...

2009-09-16T14:41:00.000+02:00

2009-09-15T14:25:00.000+02:00

2009-09-14T23:01:00.000+02:00

2009-09-11T13:47:00.007+02:00

Freed from the market constraints of the art world or the commercial constraints of the computing and science worlds, the non-economics of poetry create a perfectly valueless space in which these valueless works can flourish.

2009-09-09T10:28:00.003+02:00

Documented Flessette

2009-09-08T11:53:00.003+02:00

Here is a photo of that Flessette, Found Poem, discovered on the factory floor here at Fless Press the other day. On the other side of it is a rather inscrutable drawing - perhaps of a pair of scissors.

Overheard Dialogue in the Fless Press Publishing Department

2009-09-07T09:47:00.005+02:00

1.But what if it were modular?

2. (Stares, puzzled)

1. Would there be a way to make it modular?

2. (Laughing) There is always a way to make it modular!

1. If it were modular...(starts scribbling) - It would be...wonderful.

2009-09-04T11:40:00.003+02:00

Vegtable Oil was 2.99 now 2.69

Vegteble Oil was 2.69 now 1.99

Vegeable Oil was 1.99 now 1.69

Flessettes

2009-09-01T22:18:00.004+02:00

Some little pieces of fless found lonely and crumpled on the floor after Fless Press Recess.

New Students

Their identities as soft

as their jersey cotton knits

- and as unremarkable.

Ceiling

The cornicing is a sunburst

which screams

I was not always

a chain

bookshop.

Found Poem

Bees are working hard.

Even though it is snowing,

Even though it is time for bed.

In Rome

2009-08-30T20:29:00.007+02:00

One ought call a goat

2009-08-26T23:06:00.007+02:00

One ought call a goat Dear Creature

And say Shan't and Oughtn't and Do!

And scold a friend with the words:

I say, I think that was very bad of you.

Exchange

2009-08-25T23:10:00.004+02:00

1. You'll never guess what the next chapter's called.

2. What?

1. Fight of the Bears!

2. Gosh! (Pause) Isn't that exciting?

1. Yeah!

2. Isn't that...a bit too exciting?

1. Maybe...

2. ...for this time of night?
It is...(checks) two hours past your bedtime.
Find yourself something boring to read.

1. OK. (Long pause)
But how can I concentrate on something boring?

2. Ah...(pauses, clearly defeated by logic)...well, read the Fight of the Bears. But in a really boring voice...in your head.

1. Whatever.

A Man to his Overworked Wife

2009-08-21T12:06:00.008+02:00

Don't be nettled, Petal,
But fetch the Dettol
and don't forgettle the kettle.

Comma Tide!

2009-08-18T19:59:00.003+02:00

Workers enjoying a dip in the sea at Fless Press Holiday Camp were suprised to be engulfed by a influx of commas at high tide.

Millions of these essential phrasal pauses surrounded a group of workers as they played a sporting game of Water Polo. Quizzed by Fless Xpress on the commas appearance, the Fless Pless workers gave ambiguous answers. “While to all intents and purposes they seemed like regular flotsam or algae bloom, they somehow gave the eerie impression of controlling the tide, like a current or a force.”

Fless Xpress asked famous grammarian Less Tress her opinion on this matter. “It is simply ungrammatical,” she stated. “Commas act as clausular pauses [Or pausular clauses? - Ed.], and without content to give them context they lose all meaning .” She denied that the sea was a sufficiently meaningful content (or context).

An artist's imflession of the comma tide

Flesspiration

2009-08-13T22:01:00.002+02:00

2009-08-12T18:44:00.009+02:00

a perfectly valueless space

Glasmosphere

2009-08-11T13:59:00.004+02:00

Glasgow sky is impregnated with Glasgow air

Glasgow air is impregnated with Glasgow rain

Glasgow rain is impregnated with Glasgow sweat

Glasgow sweat is impregnated with Glasgow pollen

Glasgow pollen itches at Glasgow eyes

Glasgow eyes look at Glasgow sky, and cry.

My love floats

2009-08-10T10:31:00.004+02:00

My love floats upon the either

Till it descends into the neither.

Cinelogue

2009-08-06T15:45:00.007+02:00

- Of all the films I saw with you

(and there were quite a few)

Why - why do I remember only one or two?

- They went to the same place we did

As we lay watching them, desperately feigning

Interest.

- In all the films you show to me

My heart-shards, reflected

Cinematographically.

- To astonish her with these cheap and fragile digital mirrors -

It seems easy, yet

I don't know how I do it.

Villette Vignette

2009-08-05T13:51:00.000+02:00

A Modular Poem from Fless Press Holiday Camp

2009-08-03T19:28:00.003+02:00

Scottish sunbathing

Scuttish bunscathing

Scattish bunsuthing

Scunnish bothsating

Sunnish batscothing

Bunnish scathsuting

Bannish scotscuthing

Bathish sunscoting

Battish sconesathing

Sattish scutbothing

Suttish bathsconing

Sottish bunscathing.

Meteorological Metaphors II

2009-08-02T20:18:00.011+02:00

Each hair is a hand
That tries to catch
The clouds.

Each hair is a cloud

Your hands

Try to catch.

Waiting for the sun
To rest his eye upon
A bloused breast

Whilst the wind

Tugs at

A breasty blouse.

Sun / Cloud / Scottish sky
Brass / Steel / Brassish steel

Scottish sunbathing
Scattish bunsuthing
Battish sunscathing

Modular Poem for Now Now

2009-07-30T21:56:00.002+02:00

How the how,
How the now?

How the now
Now the cow
Cow the how
How the cow
Cow the wow
Wow the how
How the wow
Wow the cow
Cow the now
Now the wow
Wow the now
Now the how.

How the now?
Now the now!

Flessing and Pressing at the Research Club

2009-07-25T20:06:00.006+02:00

We were delighted to accept the invitation of Now Now and a Wee Tasty to show some of our work at You Know Which One He'd Rather Have, Don't You? at the Heatherington Research Club in Glasgow last Thursday. We flessed, pressed, digressed and guessed till our headscarves were sweaty and our summer uniforms frayed at the cuffs. What a Fleffort! But it was well worth results such as these (below).

And who ever thought you could concrete in the fourth dimension?

2009-07-16T14:39:00.000+02:00

2009-07-13T13:13:00.001+02:00

Meteophysical

2009-07-07T14:20:00.002+02:00

Postcard from Fless Press Holiday Camp

2009-07-05T16:10:00.000+02:00

Flesstration

2009-06-28T13:54:00.002+02:00

We found this sad piece of paper lying on a bench after Fless Press Recess yesterday.

We applaud his efforts to rid himself of Fless Stress. We hope his number comes up for Fless Press Holiday Camp soon.

Flont Teaser

2009-06-27T20:48:00.005+02:00

Our Flont design team were so inspired by the modularity of the Sessions font that we decided to have a go designing our own. Here's a peek at some of our sketches for our modular Flont Gurtular, based on our Gurtel image from our first publication, C-O-R-R-U-G-A-T-E-D (now, who remembers that?).

The design is still in its early days, and we are thrilled by the variety of textual treatments we can create during our long sessions of freeflessing. Here are a couple of ideas for an overall Flessthetic for Gurtular.

2009-06-24T01:00:00.000+02:00